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karalgaren

How I Used to Handle My Sin

Updated: Apr 21


(an excerpt from The R Word)


I used to think the Holy Spirit’s purpose was to condemn us of every sin we commit—to nag us so much we’d drag ourselves back to the Father and repent just to get rid of His badgering voice.


I can recall times when I felt so overwhelmed with guilt for doing the wrong thing that I begrudgingly would whisper, “Sorry God,” and stop. Or worse, I would keep on sinning while believing that He gets some sort of twisted satisfaction that at least I didn’t feel good doing it.


Sometimes I would even think God was going to be the one to tell on me to the other person. (Apparently, I was more afraid of the other person’s reactions than God’s heart in the matter!) At that point I would stop. I assumed the Lord knew I was sorry because I stopped doing it.


Then there were times when the pendulum would swing to the complete other side of the spectrum and I would think, “God doesn’t care about this sin. Really. Honestly. The church just wants to keep us in line, but God has bigger problems to handle.” I figured I was forgiven and under the radar, (unless of course I got really out of hand). Somewhere in there I made a cognitive decision to not sin too badly.


All my rationalizing surrounding sin had to do with not getting caught and keeping God happy. Sometimes I believed God was distant and far removed from my life. Other times I believed He was a puppeteer. There was never a happy medium or healthy outlook of the Father. It was always twisted and elusive. If asked, I could not explain why I should not sin, other than the typical answer of, “Because God said so.”


It was as if, in some weird way, I believed that repentance was all about God. That He needed us to repent because it made Him feel right about His laws. In a way, I subconsciously viewed God as an egotistical lawmaker who had to “get His way.”


The real issues I was struggling with were a blend of both legalism and license-to-sin. These are two extremes to God’s grace. One day I would be struggling with performance and rule-following, and the next I would completely abandon all responsibility for my actions!


I discovered later that I wasn’t the only person who struggled like this! In fact, the Bible clearly covers both these issues in the book of Romans.


In Romans 1, it depicts the Gentiles who were living in rampant sin. They were futile in their minds and living as pagans, with orgies and lust and greed running rampant in their lives. In Romans 6, Paul goes on to explain that living in sin, like the Gentiles, will kill you. “For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord” (Romans 6:23).


In Romans 2, Paul is speaking directly to the Jews, who were good at keeping the law. The Jews had lived under the law for a very long time, and so the message of Jesus was almost too good to be true. They couldn’t stop themselves from mixing the law in with the Gospel. So instead of living in freedom, they were adding to it by saying you must still be circumcised and continue to keep the Sabbath to be a true believer in Christ (Romans 2:28-29).


Similarly, in Romans 7, Paul goes on to explain that living under legalism, like the Jews, will also kill you. You won’t be able to uphold it, and it will burn you out and turn you against God. When they added the law to their faith, it brought people back to a place of trying to earn salvation, which is the exact opposite of receiving salvation by grace through faith (Romans 7:4-6).


In the Church today, both extremes of legalism and rampant sin still exist.



LEGALISM


Legalism today sounds like, “You must go to church on Sundays. You must tithe a certain percentage of your income. You must serve. You must evangelize. You must not use swear words. You must dress a certain way, and avoid certain activities and people…”


Though many of these things can be beneficial, if they are done out of obligation, they are destructive. There is a heavy oppression that comes with legalism. If the expectation to keep certain “rules” is harsh and comes from the pulpit and not from your heart, then it is legalism. The problem here is that when you can’t meet the criteria, it can often lead to falling into the same sins you want to avoid. Paul reminds us in I Corinthians 15:56 that “the strength of sin is the law.


Legalism leads us to a place where our mind is so consumed with not doing something wrong, that we will either end up doing it or we will grow hatefully intolerant of others who can’t keep up (which doesn’t allow us to operate in love).



LICENSE TO SIN


Because of legalism, the extreme Grace Gospel moved into America and many churches have reverted to a very soft gospel. Rampant sin exists in these churches because this new gospel has tried to “fix” the legalistic approach to the good news. Now, instead of preaching truth that could help turn a person from their sin, a very watered-down gospel is presented.


Everyone is living by their emotions, and nobody wants to hurt anyone else. This soft gospel shouts forgiveness of sin but doesn’t explain how His grace enables us to walk holy. Pastors are afraid to be too harsh to warn people of the consequences of sin.


But if we believe grace means we can sin and have no consequences in this life, then we are ignorant to the fact that sin carries with it its own consequences! It is not God out to get us, but sin simply has consequences. Period.



FREEDOM IN CHRIST


So, what is the antidote? In Romans 8, Paul makes it clear that living in sin and living under legalism will both kill you, and that Jesus came to set us free from both extremes.


For if you live according to the flesh you will die; but if by the Spirit you put to death the deeds of the body, you will live. For as many as are led by the Spirit of God, these are sons of God. For you did not receive the spirit of bondage again to fear, but you received the Spirit of adoption by whom we cry out, “Abba, Father," (Romans 8:13-15).


Living according to the flesh is what drives us towards legalism (I can earn this myself) or license to sin (my sin has no consequences). And God tells us clearly that we will die if we live to the flesh. Instead God tells us to live by the Spirit, which will enable us to live as free sons and daughters of God.


This is good news for anyone who understands the grace of God and the freedom of the cross. The ultimate truth is that freedom in Christ is rooted in having an authentic relationship with God through Jesus and by the power of the Holy Spirit.


So, what if we don’t have an authentic relationship with God?


What I’ve learned is that sometimes we have to analyze where we’re at before we are able to move forward in life. God showed me there was a deeper issue involved in my resistance to being open with Him about my struggles; and it opened the door for much needed healing in my relationship with Him...


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Does any of that resonate with you?


I know so many young Christians who struggle with this balance! The Lord has so much to say in His Word about how to live free. Not partially free, but genuinely free. My desire is to see many people walking as committed children of God who desire to obey Him because their relationship is safe and loving; not just because they’ve been taught to put on false pretenses.


Perhaps you’re here reading my blog because the Lord desires to speak to you, or perhaps a young adult you know, further about this topic. If that’s the case, keep reading my other blog posts, or check out my book “The R Word” on Amazon to go deeper, https://www.amazon.com/Word-Unspoken-That.../dp/166785609X



You can also watch some of my “The R Word” interview clips here: https://fb.watch/rmtngw9QBO/



May God draw you close and may you experience His love every day.



Love,


Kara





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